December, 2014 / Author:

Sexy Steve's Holiday Gay Sex AdviceQ: I recognize the importance of safe sex, but I am having trouble getting the condom to fit properly. Is there a specific brand or type of condom that tends to be more comfortable?

A: Different people will find different condoms more comfortable depending on penis shape and size. If you’re averaging on the bigger penis size, sometimes it’s easier to use large size (Magnum) condoms, as the condom will be less constricting of your blood flow. Adding a little bit of lube to the inside of the condom before you put it on will also increase the sensation and is a nice little trick for improved comfort.

Q: My partner of two years and I are very happy sexually, super happy together, yet we’re thinking about having a threesome because we both like the idea of incorporating someone new into our sex life. It really turns me on when we watch porn with a third person involved. This would be our first threesome. What are some of the best ways of incorporating a third person?

A: If you and your partner are both keen on letting a third person into your sexual lives, having an open and honest conversation about what you expect of this sexual endeavour is first and foremost. The rest should come naturally. Be sure that there is no jealousy involved in the reasoning behind having a threesome. Happy hunting!

Q: I keep seeing ads online and in magazines for bathhouses. What is a bathhouse? What is bathhouse etiquette?

A: Bathhouses are also known as gay saunas or steam baths, and have been around for decades. A bathhouse is a gay venue for other gay men to meet and have sex with each other. Many modern bathhouses offer saunas, steam rooms, Jacuzzis, pools and workout facilities. Pornographic videos are often played throughout the facility and sex is encouraged throughout the building, but is usually not out in the open. Safe sex should always be practised; the facility always offers condoms and lube. In Winnipeg we have two bathhouses— Adonis Spa and Aquarius Bath, which is co-ed.

Q: I have been dating the same guy for a while now and am nervous of having sex for the first time. Things become a little more complicated when it’s anal sex, do they not?

A: There are many other options such as kissing, oral and touching. Some gay couples don’t even practise anal sex and are perfectly content seeking other sexual options. But if you and your partner both have the urge to try anal sex, my first piece of advice would be take it slow. The anal area has lots of nerve endings, which can feel great and lead to orgasms, but the process may not “click” the first time. It’s all about checking in with your partner, seeing how you’re feeling and discussing what you both want.

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