Sex after kids can be a whole other ballgame. Couples with kids have gone through a lot of experiences together that may make them closer—everything from supporting a pregnant partner and learning how to change a diaper together, to watching their baby take those first few steps.
Admit it, you always wanted to bang a hot mom or dad. Well now you can.
Having kids can make you and your partner feel closer but being a parent can be so hectic that sometimes it feels like weeks since you’ve seen each other. And sometimes sex can feel like an appointment you have to book. Actually that’s not a bad idea. Here are some tips for the busy parents on how to—ahem—get busy.
- Make time. It’s easier said than done but it’s worth the effort. Find a babysitter and make a date. You don’t need to go out. In fact, staying in can be more relaxing and it gives you more of an opportunity to cuddle and be close. Make it special with a bottle of wine or your favourite craft beer. Dating doesn’t have to stop once you’re settled in with a family—and hey, it always got you laid before.
- Remember why you’re with them. Even if you met years ago, they still do the things that drove you crazy when you first met—like how they look when they just won an argument or the sexy way they put on their shirt. Notice the things that made you fall in love. And now that you’re parents together, they’re probably doing a bunch of other stuff that’s sexy in a different way, like holding your baby while she falls asleep or expertly answering all of her “why?” questions. Admit it, you always wanted to bang a hot mom or dad. Well now you can.
- Props. Make a date out of shopping for sex toys or picking out a hot video. It’s a good way to build up the anticipation together. Like they say, foreplay starts as soon as sex is over. If you’re nervous about going into a store together, shopping online together can be just as fun. If it’s your first time, you might want to go to a store and talk to someone who knows what they’re doing. Videos or erotica books are a great way to get new ideas and build up that anticipation.
- Geography. No, not the stuff you won’t be able to help your kid with once they get to Grade 5—location. You don’t need to go up to a rooftop to get things going, unless of course that’s your thing. Even the living room as opposed to the bedroom can be exciting if the kids are at school or daycare. Just push aside the Lego and the Sesame Street Gang and enjoy the temporary quiet. Unless of course you put on a sexy playlist…
- Great sex goes hand in hand with great music. Songza has a great variety of choices, but some- times the mood calls for something unexpected. Ambient post-rock, for example. Songs without lyrics have a way of putting you into a trance-like state that sets the mood without being cheesy or cliché. Try IN VIA by Frames for a sense of mellow intimacy. But hey, at this point, anything that isn’t One Direction or Taylor Swift has the potential to be a turn on, right?