While my personal mission is to meet an older man for a long-term relationship, this article can really apply to anyone trying to meet their soulmate. If you’re like me, you’re interested in meeting and getting to know a number of people to bring into your inner circle of friends, each of whom may fill a different need you have. For example, in my case, I not only want to meet
Mr. Right, but I’m looking for a live-in domestic assistant and team members for my business. I’d also like to be a member of one or more local social groups where I can share the company of older gay men.
The problem is, where do you find Mr. Right? What resources are available? I live a fairly sheltered life, so my exposure is limited. I’d love to invite you to join me on this quest so we can explore all the possibilities together. By working together, I believe we will be far more likely to find what we are each looking for. You know of resources I don’t know, and I may know of resources you don’t.
Sadly, when it comes to meeting people, only a few things come to my mind. Local clubs and bars, dating services and the Internet. None of these really works for me. I’m legally blind and can’t see in the dark clubs and bars. I don’t drink, they’re too loud and they are more for the late evening party crowd. None of that interests me, and I’m not looking for guys who are drawn to that lifestyle.
I’ve only contacted one dating service recently, but from what I’ve been told, there isn’t a local service that serves the GLBT community.
For some people, the Internet is a fantastic resource for finding a soulmate, but for me, that hasn’t yet been my experience. Many of the websites have terms of service that aren’t in alignment with what I’m looking for. It’s fairly common for me to spend a lot of time writing profiles and postings, only to have them deleted because I unintentionally violated their rules. As a visually impaired person, most of these sites are far too difficult for me to navigate and the entire ordeal can be extremely timeconsuming.
Back in 1995, when I came out of the closet at age 33, I was lucky enough to find Prime Timers, a social organization for older gay and bisexual men. It was a fantastic resource for me. The problem is, the local chapter closed a couple years ago.
In my search, I’ve met some older gay men, but most of them are attracted to younger men. I’ve invited them to work with me to create a local social group similar to Prime Timers. I found it fascinating that they all declined as they’re attracted to younger men.
What made that fascinating to me was the logic. When I was younger, and looking for older, I was blessed that someone created a group of older gay men. I only had to go to that one place to meet a wide cross section of the older gay community. It would have been ridiculous for me to look for older gay men in a group of young men. Go fishing where the fish are!
Now that the Winnipeg chapter of Prime Timers has closed, I’ve started looking for resources that are available to help me find older gay men. While I haven’t been that successful yet, this is what I did find. The Rainbow Resource Centre has a Queer Men’s Discussion Group that meets every second Sunday evening. They have other groups, like the Society of OutStanding Artists, but so far there isn’t much male participation in the group. There is also a 55+ Positive Space Initiative.
Out There Sports & Recreation has a variety of local groups like Front Runners, Hiking, Tennis, Badminton, Cycling, Bowling and Curling. One of its affiliate groups is Lesbian Arts, Crafts and Entertainment. Over time I’m getting to know members of the community in theses organizations.
While I’m still looking for other social organizations in Winnipeg that cater to the GLBT community, I’ve come to the conclusion that one of the best solutions is to start creating the types of groups, organizations, clubs and events I’m looking for myself. This would include a variety of solutions such as a networking group, social groups for specific subgroups within the GLBT community such as older gay men, singles dating clubs and other social events. I also want to build on what LAMBDA created in the past in terms of a networking group for local gay business owners. This could include restarting another Winnipeg chapter of Prime Timers.
So what does all this mean to you? If you want a local club, group, social organization or event, let me know! This can be for any group within the community and for any purpose. For example, if you want to be a member of a club for older GLBT members, let me know. If you want to attend afternoon coffee gatherings for retired gay men, tell me. If you want to attend a monthly dining out for the lesbian community, call me. If you are an older gay man looking for younger, we should create a singles dating club for older gay men, so contact me!
I’d love to meet you if you feel there’s a need in the community that’s not being filled. Tell me what you want and I’ll see what I can do about creating it. If you want to help participate in its creation, that’s even better!
If you know about community resources that exist which were not mentioned in this article, I’d love to have you contact me so I can pass them on to others who may be looking.
David Elliott transforms peoples’ lives by empowering them to get paid to live the life they desire. Contact him if you want to rock your world! Email firstname.lastname@example.org
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